"You Might Live In Texas..."

Hootersville is said to be a funny place. But then all of Texas (or "Taxes" as we locals prefer to call it..) is a bit odd to most of the citizenry of these United States. For sure, everything that stings, sticks, or bites will eventually be encountered here. You can become bogged down in mud, or dry sand, or even caught on a rock pile, all in one area, and witness a severe drought become a major flood zone in the span of a couple of hours. Some folks would argue that the reverse is just as probable. But there are some interesting quirks that the ever-popular Jeff Foxworthy pointed out recently that I'd like to share:

Jeff asks - "Do you live in Texas ?"

If you wear shorts and a parka at the same time to a football game,
You might live in Texas.

If you consider a great weekend vacation to be anywhere south of Dallas,
You might live in Texas.

If all your friends have collided with a deer more than once in their life,
You might live in Texas.

If you've ever talked on the phone for over an hour, to someone who just dialed the wrong number,
You might live in Texas.

If you just got assistance from a guy in the building supply store ...
And the guy doesn't even work there ...
You might live in Texas.

If you measure distance in terms of hours or days instead of miles,
You might live in Texas.

If you've put up security lights around your house and property ...
But you STILL leave the garage door wide open & never lock the doors,
You can bet you live in Texas.

If you always keep a set of jumper cables in the truck ... I said "truck";
And your wife KNOWS how to use them,
You MIGHT live in Texas.

If the posted speed limit is 70, but you're driving 80, and everybody's PASSING you,
You undoubtedly live in Texas.

And if you can relate to any or all of the afore-mentioned,
You're there....Bigger'n Dallas.